THREE SEASONS in SANDWICH: Outliving the Queen

As we begin to navigate the budding Carolean era of King Charles III, I am not the first person to observe that, prior to his reign, when there was a reference to "the Queen," there was no question as to which queen in particular was meant. Clearly, unless one was in Denmark, no one would wonder whether this was a reference to Margrethe II. Certainly, no one would have believed that the reference was to any of the numerous Queen Consorts throughout the world, such as Rania of Jordan or Sylvia of Buganda. Even TSO would not think of moi when hearing a reference to the Queen because, to him, I am "Mi Reina."

"The Queen," as we all know, was none other than Elizabeth Alexandra Mary Windsor a/k/a Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II. I still refer to her as such, despite her death some eight months ago.

"The Queen" was born in London on April 21, 1926. Eleven days earlier, across the pond, TSO's father, John Peter Illo, was born in the Bronx. Their lives were worlds apart, and, although their paths never intersected, they certainly ran parallel in many respects. Lilibet's and John's early childhoods coincided with the Great Depression. They served in the military during World War II. Together with their spouses, they had many children (she, 4; he, 6). They endured the pain of suffering the deaths of their spouses to whom they had been married for decades (she, 73 years; he, 68). They probably had many other things in common. Yet, for as long a life the Queen had lead before she died, John Peter Illo's was a bit longer. Another of the Greatest Generation has been lost to time.

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Often, after people die, those who are left behind tell stories of the little coincidences they had experienced either immediately before or immediately after a loved one's death -- experiences that take on special meaning when examined in the context of the loss. Below is a little essay by TSO on his experiences in recent days:

On Saturday morning, May 20, 2023, Kathryn and I were sitting in our beach house living room when, suddenly, she gasped upon seeing a red cardinal land on the back of a chair on our deck, not more than five feet from where I was sitting on the sofa. Cardinals are not an ordinary sight here on the beach. Kathryn told me of the meaning of red cardinals and wondered aloud whether my father had passed away. As the cardinal sat perched atop the chair, a female cardinal joined him. After a pause, they flitted about for a bit before flying up and away. I found the following online regarding the symbolism of a red cardinal: "The red cardinal is a spiritual messenger from God. The red cardinal is representative of departed loved ones."

Yesterday afternoon, I was walking along East Sandwich Beach when I received a text from my brother Michael letting me know that Dad had passed away. I immediately turned around and went back to our house to tell Kathryn. A few hours later we drove to our church here in Sandwich, Corpus Christi, to light a candle and to say some prayers. We parked next to an old red Ford F-150 pickup, and noticed a bit incongruously that the there was an older lady in the driver's seat. She looked like she could have been close to my Dad's age. As we got out of our car, this sweet woman rolled down her window, said hello and introduced herself to us as Paula, and told us that she had just picked some Solomon's Seal and placed it in the adoration chapel, which was our destination. Kathryn shared with our new friend that my father had just passed away a few hours ago, and Paula tearfully said that the flowers were for my father.

Kathryn and I went into the church, lit a candle for Dad in front of the Infant of Prague, and went to the adoration chapel to pray. There we saw Paula's Solomon's Seal on either side of the small altar.

Solomon's Seal is not a plant that we were familiar with, and I was touched to realize that the flowers look like those of Lilly of the Valley, which was one of my Mom's favorite flowers. (My sister Camille has a story about Lilly of the Valley and Mom's near-fatal accident in 2007.) Solomon's Seal is larger and more masculine than the more delicate and feminine Lilly of the Valley. It was, again, an echo of the male and female cardinals, and I believe a sign of my Mom and Dad being re-united.

We finished our prayers. As we drove home, Kathryn looked up information about Solomon's Seal on her phone and let out another gasp. "Solomon's seal is used to treat lung disorders, reduce swelling (inflammation)", read Kathryn. My father passed away from Covid. He was blessed with a peaceful death.